How The Huskers Losing Can Benefit Omaha

You'll not find too many sports related musings in this space however with the recent dust up over the Husker loss to Missouri and the proposed demolition of Rosenblatt stadium in favor of building a new one downtown I offer the following solution: A 2% bitching tax on all football complaints. Each second of complaining about football is equal to one dollar. If you bitch for one minute you are taxed on $60 at 2% for a total of $1.20. Please mail $1.20 to Mayor Mike Fahey. If the bitching occurs on a Monday morning and disrupts coworkers in your office, the tax doubles. This professional infraction is equivalent to speeding in a construction zone -- the fine doubles. I predict if we implement this program the funds for a new baseball stadium will be raised by Thanksgiving and construction shall be completed by St. Patty's Day. And I would have no problem being honored for this accomplishment. I ask for no money though. Only that I see these words in 25 foot lettering: Flimsy Lament Stadium.